I know, I know. It's supposed to be Thursday Thirteen. But I'm always a day late and a dollar short these days. I just wanted to catch your attention! I really don't have fifteen things to say, at least I don't think I do. I haven't made a list.
Proverbs 17:22 in The Message says , "A cheerful disposition is good for your health; gloom and doom leave you bone-tired." I've always thought of myself as a pretty cheerful person. But I'm bone tired.
One of the reasons I'm bone tired is that I have gained weight and, I believe, I weigh more than I ever have. I haven't weighed myself, because my scale gave up and I threw it away (Little Feisty helped it to its demise by stomping on it every morning, but I didn't care because it was so old and probably not even accurate). I just know that my clothes don't fit, my jowls are back, my feet hurt, my back aches, and I am in general really disgusted with myself. I refuse to have my wedding ring sized larger!
I am a "backslidden" Weight Watcher. I have guilt on top of weight, because I know EXACTLY what I need to do, I just am not doing it. And now - we're heading into the hugest eating frenzy of the year, starting this Sunday afternoon with our church's Thanksgiving dinner. YIKES!! What if I win Pea's chocolate contest??
It's a cycle - I don't feel like going to the gym, so I don't go, which makes me feel worse. And guilty, because I'm paying for the gym. I can't go for the walks I used to do, because of the ankle injury. I need the exercise even more now because of the osteopenia diagnosis.
I don't know if there is a connection, but I just don't have the energy to do all of the things on my "to do" list (well, I don't really have a list, because I haven't had the energy to write it all down and see what all needs to be done). The thought of Christmas shopping is daunting. Even the thought of dragging everything up from the basement to decorate sounds like too much. No, I'm not depressed. I just feel so lazy! Even DC is beginning to worry about my lack of get-up-and-go. It got up and went! I just don't know where.
I know this isn't funny, inspiring, educational, or any of the things I like to read on other blogs. It's just the way I feel today.
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10 comments:
I think you just wrote the story of MY life, too, Dawn. Part of my problem is this cold/creeping crud/whatever I'm fighting, but I just can't get motivated to do anything, seems like.
And we have a Harvest Dinner at church on Sunday, too.
Well, there's really nothing wrong with feeling lazy occasionally. I feel very lazy today, as a matter of fact. I have laundry piled high and it can just wait. I'm not in the mood. You don't have to be inspiring and uplifting all the time. Being real and honest counts for a lot, too, you know.
I know exactly how you feel Dawn. I hate to admit this, but I am beginning to think age may have something to do with it (for me any way). Or perhaps it is just all the "stuff" of life that occassionally just becomes too much and our minds and bodies need some rest.
I have a great idea. Let's not be too hard on ourselve. We'll enjoy the holidays without pushing beyond our limits and when the new year comes we will all encourage one another to reach for some manageable goals. I need to lose a few pounds too - so we can cheer each other on. In the meantime - let's relax and enjoy our families and the holidays. The "stuff" will always be there.
Create a list of positives. It helps. Maybe I should join the gym with you. I don't have jowls, but am certainly not in shape. We could inspire eachother!! I think it'd make me feel better to start working out again.
And for the record; I still don't think you look bad!
Dawn, you have always been one of my favorite blog friends to come visit and read. You mentioned Osteoparosis the other day. My Mom started taking Boniva and she feels better on a monthly basis. However, the biggest change in her life was when they tested her for thyroid desease and it was necessary to start her on life time meds. She has since lost the extra weight she gained. She has a lot more energy. She used to just be exhausted all the time. Yet, she really had trouble sleeping. She still does have trouble sleeping. I will pray you find and answer, and I hope DC is doing better too! :)
Dawn, Your post is a blessing to others because it helps us all realize how perfectly normal it is to feel this way at times. Feeling this way can be so overwhelming... but start with one day at a time, one step at a time! When I want to drop a few pounds, I drink only water, eat only half of everything or just serve myself half of a normal serving (I know it sounds wasteful), slice carrots and other vegetables to keep in the refrig. to snack on, and last but not least PRAY for the strength to follow through. I do hope you feel better soon and be encouraged by the fact that all of blogsville will be praying for YOU!
Don't be too hard on yourself. It's hard to stay motivated to go to the gym by yourself. Add to that the guilt of paying for a membership and not using it, and it makes you feel even worse. I think Linda's and Kristen's ideas are excellent.
Oh you know you're not alone Sister! I know exactly what you mean. I'm the heaviest I've ever been! I used to do this program, First Place. It really helps to have the accountability. It's time to start that again!
You sound a bit overwhelmed, so maybe not looking at such a big to do list, or all those pounds, but manageable little bits of to do and weight loss? Then reward yourself for a good job, and do it again. This time of year can be a lot to handle.
I have struggled with the same 8-10 lbs for years. I know it may not sound like much, but it makes a world of difference how I look & feel. I have discovered that if there are sweets nearby...i will eventually eat them. And I am really feeding my brain 'lust' instead of my stomach as I thought I was. I'm working on it. I lost the pounds only to gain them back rapidly with the Halloween candy clearance sales. Pitiful...isn't it. Oh well, life is a series of ups and downs..if only I can learn to THINK b efore I put those calories in my mouth. Because, I enjoy salads and cold veggies more than junk...but the junk must stay out of the house. I admire you for posting about weight and know you will have success...its just around the corner if we stay focused and bring it to the LORD daily. hugs...Maggie
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